Saw this while driving yesterday in Blackfoot. It made me wish for a moment that I could be the person giving directions to my home, saying: "You'll come to a perched porta-potty on the corner. Take a left there, and follow it down..."



Who doesn't love seeing an outhouse in place of a street sign? Not to mention, I took this photo with my new blackberry. And that made me proud! I'm learning so much about my new phone. :)

There's more to this state than potatoes...only Idaho could bring this out of me.

Halloween in Pocatello...I was impressed with how this town celebrates. Most fun I've had on the 31st in quite a while.   We went to the Depot to support Paul, our sports anchor, who was MC for the night.

KPVI at the Depot...

  

 

channel 6, channel 8, and Idaho State Journal combine forces

Channel 8 and Channel 6 Love

maine.

I've had the goal for many years.  And now...it's official...mission accomplished! Since the year 2000, I have visited all fifty states! 

Last month, Maine was the final destination. I requested the company of my Aunt Ruthanne and Uncle Bill (aka Step Daddy). We had so much fun! We dined on Lobster, shopped at the Burberry Outlet, visited lighthouses, and even visited my dear friends Andrea and Adam!

  
 

Out of my travels of the states the past ten years...here are my official top five:

Hawaii (original, I know)

Alaska (summer home? Yes, Please!)

Vermont (classic covered bridges and white chapels everywhere, plus Ben and Jerry's. What's not to love?)

Maine

Oregon (the coast is divine!)

 

My most favorite U.S. Cities I've visited:

New York (It has my heart)

Seattle

Chicago

Washington D.C.

Ybor City, Florida

San Fran

Richmond, Virginia

Portland

Coeur d'Alene, Idaho

 

Least Favorite States...

North Dakota

Mississippi wasn't too impressive either...

 

 

...now I need to work on countries.

Eastern Idaho State Fair. Wow...it made me proud to be an Idahoan this summer. Beyond Chocolate Covered Bacon, I also got to enjoy a kiss from 80's heart throb Huey Lewis. Yes, he's older now. I'm not the best mathematician, so I googled to check, and it's confirmed--Huey's older than my father. I called to tell him that--my dad--that I have now kissed someone older than him. During the silence that followed after giving dad this news, I pictured his confusion, disbelief and deep hope I was kidding. When I told him it was 59-year-old Huey Lewis--he seemed proud and laughed. "That's my girl!"

 

I was asked to come out on stage during his concert dancing, carrying one of his instruments, which Huey played, and ended by kissing me. I wasn't really feeling "The Power of Love", but still, a moment to remember was made. Three Cheers for 80's Heart Throbs who never die and for allowing a girl to make her daddy proud! ;)

the bannock county bluegrass festival

...the best day ya'll missed in pocatello!

Today, my dear grandfather Rondo Isaac Manwaring passed away 20 years ago. He was an incredible man who passed away when I was 9, and I still remember being heart broken when my mom took me out of my 4th grade class at Uintah Elementary to tell me the news. I had seen him just three days earlier with my grandma when they came for a surprise visit to our home in Salt Lake City. I remember his bear hug, and asking him to crack my back (gotta love a chiropractor grandpa).  He was so handsome, and good, and had a beautiful smile--it showed in his eyes even more than his mouth. I now have the blessed opportunity to be living with his widow--my Grandma Lois Ruth Peterson Manwaring in Pocatello, Idaho. She hasn't lived with anyone since her husband passed away in 1989, nor has she ever lived with a grandchild. Yet, she's welcomed me into her home with the love a grandchild could only hope for. And being  in her home has been a tremendous blessing and eye opener for me as my grandma has become my best friend, and closest family I have right now. And I want to thank her. I want to thank her for being so strong after the love of her life passed away, and for taking care of herself, and as she has said, realizing in september of 19889 that she was no longer just the matriarch of her family, but also the patriarch, and she has fit and accomplished those roles diligently, beautifully, and with dignity and humility. 

I was grateful to have had the opportunity to clean my  grandpa's grave with her the weekend of Memorial Day. It will be a moment I will cherish forever as my grandma shared with me her sorrows, but also the strength she choose to have when the sudden tragedy occurred. And she has been that strength--steadfast--ever since. 

She's welcomed me with open arms the time I've needed it the most. I know my own mother told me that her father, my grandpa, if still alive, wouldn't have it any other way, but that he too would suggest and welcome me to live with them. And I do live with him. Every day I watch my grandmother take both his and her own roles--caring for their children, their grandchildren, welcoming their many new great grandchildren.

My grandma and grandpa met on their mission to the central states. My grandma grew up in California, and had a fiance she was very in love with. When he was killed in the war, she thought her life was over, and was called by her bishop to serve a mission. And on her mission, not only did she learn lessons to carry her throughout her life and strengthen her family, she also met a man from Blackfoot, Idaho. They were married and moved to Pocatello in the early 60's.

I can't believe it's been 20 years since his funeral. Since the day I first felt the sting and sorrow and shock of death. But to a woman who was losing her love in her early 60's is something I can only imagine. Thank you grandma for being so strong. For being so full of conviction. For being something we can all admire and work towards. Thank you for being my home and my family. Thank you for my amazing mother, and raising her the way you and grandpa did. I've the most amazing mom in the entire world. I'm honored to be a Manwaring, and so grateful to have the lovely memories I do of Grandpa 20 years later, and for the  memories I am presently creating with you. 

I'm doing more make up and style work and you can check out my newest blog at laurenmakeup.blogspot.com  I had the opportunity to do work with Kristy C Photo. My beautiful cousin Natalie was the willing model. She let me do three different looks...and we were up past midnight. The first pic is taken before make up, hair and wardrobe. And then the afters... (and just to make a few more jaws drop--she's the mother of four!) for more pics, visit my new blog! 

 
 

 

after this, I think I can officially call Idaho home. I've shot more guns since I've been here the past two and a half months, than I have in my whole lifetime.

For all you "Office" lovers out there...enjoy this video of us having fun at the station. 

This was such a great day! Spent it with the Christian Motorcycle Association. What studs! One badge on a leather vest read: 'Faith--the Other F word." I think my future hubby and I need to be bikers at some point...

chuckars first pitch

...alas, I tried. :)

I'm really doing it. I've always loved fashion, make up, clothes... and I'm always asked by friends to do make up for weddings or special events. So, finally, I'm creating a portfolio of sorts. check out my new blog at laurenmakeup.blogspot.com for more pics! Here are a few make over examples I recently did for some of my Ohio Mission favorites...The Before's...taken before hair, make up and wardrobe...

  

The Before's...taken before hair, make up and wardrobe... annie, holly, and emily.

Talented photographer Kristy Cefalo took before and after photographs of three of my beautiful girlfriends. All of us have been friends for 6 years since our days serving an LDS Misson in Cleveland Ohio.

  

  
 
 

for more pics of annie, holly, emily, and others i've done make up on, visit my new blog at laurenmakeup.blogspot.com! Thanks girls for a fun night and being great and willing models!

I did it...I moved to Pocatello, Idaho last week! As nervous as I was, I couldn't say no to my dream career any longer. So here I am, living with my dear grandmother, eating her whole wheat bread every day, taking up her closet space with my clothes, and enjoying cousins as neighbors. In my first week here, I've done a lot...so much, that as soon as 6 pm hits, and my shift here are work ends, I'm hoping to fall asleep for at least two days.



The weeks highlights:
-Ben Hollingshouse helped me move up--thanks Ben!
-Reporting every day--love my job! Love my co-workers!
-Date on Friday with a friend from SLC--Laser Tag!
-Went to a shooting range with my co-workers who taught me how to shoot a pistol.
-Learning better video shooting skills--I'm getting better!
-Getting my live shots down great, and messing up on just as many...hey, practice makes perfect...I'm getting there.
-Spent a morning surrounded by hummingbirds, and holding one of them in my hands! (video link below)
-Hanging out with my cousins and Aunt Renee. Staying up too late just talking.
-Visiting my cousin Braden, his wife Luciane, and their beautiful new baby Joseph in the hospital, and being able to hold him (the new baby...not my cousin Braden).
-Meeting and hanging out with really fabulous 2nd cousins last night. It's great to be a Manwaring!

...I'm loving my Eastern Idaho home. Tomorrow--my first day off in a while. I'm making it official and getting an Idaho Drivers License. whoa.

twenty or other random things about me... (confesssions maybe?)

-i avoid my inevitable tasks to the bitter end. from homework to laundry...right now i should be packing, and have filled up on caffeine to allow me to stay up long enough to do so. but alas...
-i have a constant desire to create lists (example: this one). rather than read to fall asleep, i list things...it doesn't matter what. names in alphabetical order, to do lists, dream lists, grocery lists, cool company name lists, word lists, goal lists, quote lists...
-i'm inspired by irony. a day isn't a day unless it has some ironic twist to its activities. Anything sensical or stable seems slightly bland to me.
-i like chuck-a-rama. best salad bars in the slc...and their scones and honey butter--to die for. everyone seems so tormented by the idea that it's a buffet, but hey, that's what the sneeze guards are for. :)
-those annoying get-to-know you games that everyone is forced to play at one time or another--Love Them!
-i once said with pride and determination that I would never fold a kleenex in half to blot my lipstick, nor would I ever type those weird sideways smileys...I do both now. :-)
-i can T9 (predictive text) without even looking at the number pad on my phone. i discovered this while driving. i wrote three pages of text and realized I never once took my eyes off the road.
-when someone compliments me on something i'm wearing, i do that obnoxious thing and tell them how much it cost and where i got it because i am always so proud of my thriftiness. ["target, on sale! 9.99 plus 40% off! O-M-G! totally go get one!"]
-i've never been satisfied with my hair color, but heaven forbid i go natural.
-i just want to be held and loved and told that everything is going to be okay.
-i love scary movies! it's my favorite genre by far.  
-sometimes i judge people by their name. (but i'm working on not)
-i cry sometimes because i miss my dog that died three years ago.
-i consider myself a runner, but truly, i'm a walk/jogger...a 1 miler walk/jogger, once- a-weeker..ish..er
-i over salt my food.
-love the smell of gas stations.
-i slept in my parents room, i swear, until i was like 10. i was scared of kidnappers.
-bladder control? not my specialty.
-i never owned a barbie
-i wish i could be vegetarian because there is a bit of an animal rights activist in me...but i tried it for a few months and i gained weight. i guess being thin is more important to me than saving animals lives.
-im wearing a skirt right now because my jeans don't fit.
-if I were a prescription drug, I'd be provigil.
-i've never been able to whistle or roll my R's. A handicap of the tongue perhaps?
-remember mcgruff the crime dog? growing up, i thought mcgruff homes were a conspiracy theory. i thought, "if i were a kidnapper, i'd become a mcgruff home so that kids would feel safe coming to my home and it'll lure them inside...[evil laugh]" you can start to see why i slept in my parents room for so long.

.

Catching up from the past many Fabulous Months!

San Fran with Bryn Arnell and Emily Lloyd:

Obama is elected as President of the U.S.!

New Years in Grand Targhee, Photos by Joel Addams:


My birthday...I'm 29! Thank you to Ally, Dana, CK, and Brooke for the birthday gatherings. Having all of my dearest friends in one place is the best thing I could ask for on my birthday!

Photo shoot with Kristy Cefelo Photography. Kristy was my mission companion for four months in Chardon, Ohio. I love her so! kristycphoto



As of now:
New York with Ruthanne, Clark, Bethany, and Baby Adrian:

i love my nephew adrian soren. nyc

Moab and Skydiving with Abby and Ryan Hawthorn (my best friend from Kindergarten came to visit me!)

Other adventures here and there:



 

Living with my grandma in Pocatello, Idaho half my weeks reporting the news. I love living with grandma Lois. She is my best friend, my confidant, my mender of clothes, vitamin consultant, bread making comforter. A blessing in my life that I am learning so much good from. I Recenlty updated my reporting audition tape with the help of my dear brother Pace. I love my family. They are each such incredible individuals with amazing hearts. The people I love the most have been through a lot and are still going through much. I pray for them every day, and I know we are going to get through this! I am so grateful for my faith, my family, and dear friendships.

I will do a better job of keeping my blog updated. Life becomes overwhelming and so does recording. I'll do better.

Happy Easter Family. I love this following paragraph's and have wanted to share them for a while. It was written by a woman named Elizabeth Gilbert while she was studying Buddhism in Indonesia. I've read it to dad before. Thinking of each of you and feeling so blessed and full of faith! I love you all.
-Lauren

"In the search for God, you revert from what attracts you and swim toward that which is difficult. You abandon your comforting and familiar habits with the hope (the mere hope!) that something greater will be offered you in return for what you've given up. Every religion in the world operates on the same common understandings of what it means to be a good disciple--get up early and pray to your God, hone your virtues, be a good neighbor, respect yourself and others, master your cravings. We all agree that it would be easier to sleep in, and many of us do, but for millennia there have been others who choose instead to get up before the sun and wash their faces and go to their prayers. And then fiercely try to hold on to their devotional convictions throughout the lunacy of another day.

The devout of this world perform their rituals without guarantee that anything good with ever come of it. Of course there are plenty of scriptures and plenty of priests who make plenty of promises as to what your good works will yield ( or threats as to the punishments awaiting you if you lapse), but to even believe all of this is an act of faith, because nobody amongst us is shown the endgame. Devotion is diligence without assurance. Faith is a way of saying, "Yes, I pre-accept the terms of the universe and I embrace in advance what I am presently incapable of understanding. " There's a reason we refer to "leaps of faith"--because the decision to consent to any notion of divinity is a mighty jump from the rational over the unknowable, and I don't care how diligently scholars of every religion will try to sit you down with their stacks of books and prove to you through scripture that their faith is indeed rational: it isn't. If faith were rational, it wouldn't be--by definition--faith. Faith is a belief in what you cannot see or prove or touch. Faith is walking face-first and full-speed into the dark. If we truly knew all the answers in advance as to the meaning of life and the nature of God and the destiny of our our souls, our belief would not be a leap of faith and it would not be a courageous act of humanity: it would just be...a prudent insurance policy.

I'm not interested in the insurance industry. I'm tired of being a skeptic, I'm irritated by spiritual prudence and I feel bored and parched by empirical debate. I don't want to hear it anymore I couldn't care less about evidence and proof and assurances. I just want God. I want God inside me. I want God to play in my bloodstream the way sunlight amuses itself on water. "

I keep saying I'm going to update my blog...so much keeps taking place, so much I want to share, to write about, and record. Presently, I find myself too busy to even reflect on the daily events that make life so beautiful. I was sent this quote today, and it raised my spirits! I am hoping to slow down, and make refection and stillness a greater part of my life. And hopefully my blogging will thrive because of this new and clear decision. We shall see.

Make up your mind to be happy-even when you don't have money, even when
you don't have a clear complexion, even when you don't have the Nobel
Prize. Some of the happiest people I know have none of these things
the world insists are necessary for satisfaction and joy. Why are they
happy? I suppose it is because they don't listen very well. Or they
listen too well-to the things their hearts tell them. They glory in
the beauty of the earth. They glory in the rivers and the canyons and
the call of the meadowlark. They glory in the love of their families,
the stumbling steps of a toddler, the wise and tender smile of the elderly.
They glory in honest labor. They glory in the scriptures. They glory
in the presence of the Holy Ghost. One thing I know for certain: the
time we have here goes by far too quickly. Don't waste any more time
sitting on the bench watching life pass you by.

--Joseph B. Wirthlin

 I attended a reporting workshop in L.A. last week. The photo is of my newest BFF—Randy Jackson. My week in California was beautiful. I stayed with my 89-year-old grandma, and learned so much about her as she shared with me her life--picking cotton in Arizona, her time in the WAC, the handsome men that were always hitting on her, and how she met my grandpa. I loved her stories. It's why I love reporting too--everyone has a story to share, and I want to be able to help share these stories with the world. I also went shopping in my grandma's closet, and brought home with me twice as much as I came out with--everything from the raddest 80’s gear, the classiest 1940’s suit, a mink coat (hey, that vegan phase I went through is over, so don’t point fingers), the most fabulous clip-on earrings I have ever laid eyes on, and THREE pairs of cowboy boots. They say every woman's wardrobe needs a little black dress, but I would also suggest cowboy boots in colors for pre and post-labor day also being a necessity--I'm wearing my black ones now. I am set with my winter wardrobe, and am excited to be able to wake up each morning and put on a piece of my grandmothers history.


A day I’ll never forget was my second day of field reporting. I reported on my first murder. It was overwhelming for me, to say the least. The man--Edward Gaucho--was only 19-years old, and was sitting on his porch the previous night with friends when a drive-by shooting took place. I interviewed the LAPD, his neighbors, his brother, and his friend. The neighbor told us that although he was shocked such a great young man was killed, he wasn't surprised with the crime because the community was seeing more gang-related incidents. We went to Edward’s apartment, where his family still resides. His brother showed us Edwards’s graduation photo and told us what a great brother he was. He and his friend pointed out where the bullet holes in the door and ceiling were. They started arguing over one bullet hole, because the brothers’ friend said it was an old one, "when they shot the other guy." It was hard to think these boys could be no older than 12 and had already seen numerous shootings, one ending in the death of a brother. I realized that if this mother knew how, she would do anything to move her children into a safer environment. Yet, it was obvious she couldn't afford to, nor did she speak any English, a skill that would be necessary to get a higher-paying job. Edward's mother stepped out into the hallway, and while she seemed okay with us being there, she didn't want to see the camera. She sat in the hallway, around the corner from where I was reporting, and sobbed uncontrollably. I continued my reporting, repeating my lines for the camera over and over again, pointing out the bullet holes one by one, as I felt tortured by the women's cries, his mother, still in the corner. What I felt worst about was being a reporter discussing her son’s tragedy so seemingly nonchalantly, because it was my job. I thought, she must hate me, and hate that I am here. When the camera man scolded me for not carrying a compact mirror with me to fix my hair (something supposedly all reporters should do--lesson learned), I found a makeshift mirror in the hall by using the reflection of the glass on the fire extinguisher case. Just as I was checking out my hair in the glass, the mother peaked around the corner to see what was going on. I felt awful, feeling nothing could come off as more vain and insensitive than checking out my reflection and primping. Here was a woman who just lost her oldest child because of a drive-by shooting, and I am caring about if my hair is in place?!? The woman then went back into her apartment. I knew it. She had had it. My vanity had disgusted her. About 30 seconds later though, she reappeared, carrying a large wall mirror from her apartment. She walked over and set it on top of the fire extinguisher. She looked at me and smiled. It was a sad smile, one that spoke the smeared make-up under her eyes. But it was a smile that in a moment our hearts connected, and I mustered a deep-felt "gracias" while our eyes searched each other for answers. I am unsure if she ever found her answer, but I found mine. Mother Theresa's quote came into my mind: "If we have no peace, it is because we forget we belong to each other." With tears still in her eyes, and no response, she turned away. I primped myself in the lovely mirror she set up for me, and I continued on with my stand-up. Edward, too young to die, has an beautiful mother. A mother so selfless, so humble, so kind, that she finds it within herself to help a reporter out with something as simple as a mirror. The reporter is telling the story of her son’s tragic death. "Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not" I don't think I have witnessed a more compassionate act in quite some time, and it is, and always will be, a beautiful reminder of what we, as human beings, can become.

Today I felt the kind of bliss that sends chills up the body, and makes one realize they're on a true and fitting path. I think I’m a fairly happy person, but still, that pure and flawless sensation of bliss doesn’t happen every day, or even often. It’s rare. And I’m glad it is. If it weren’t uncommon, I wouldn’t be as attuned to notice, or perhaps care. But in a moment of bliss such as this everything stands still. It’s enough to make me stop, take it in, and savor the voice that is telling me I am doing something so right in my life, and so ideal, that I feel it. The popular quote comes to my mind: “Follow your Bliss.” And I realize everything has aligned so perfectly at this moment that this is a direction I must follow. Because bliss has told me that not only is it a good path to move forward on, it couldn’t be more authentic, genuine, and unmistakably real.

...Either that, or I've just had too much caffeine.

Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. Not only do I love the book, but I apparently wrote it in my past life.


It was featured on Oprah and then became a New York Times best seller. Before reading it, the trend turned me off. ...But because Oprah loved the book so much, I decided to give it a try. Oprah and I are best friends. We just haven't met in person yet. But let me tell you, when we do meet...goodbye Gayle, and hello Lauren! We're pretty much soul mates--Oprah and I. I used to write her and attempt to tell her this, (I wish I could tell you I was kidding, and I'm sure many of you think I am, but sadly, I can't). I would ask to be her intern, or be on her show, but I never got a response. But don't think I'm giving up. One day Oprah and I WILL share tea together. And one day I will find a t-shirt that says, "I heart Oprah" that I can wear to bed. And speaking of soul mates, it reminds me of the quotes I want to share, and the purpose of writing this entry: to share these words from Eat Pray Love--the overly-trendy book I wrote in my past life. The book I love, along with the rest of the world...and, of course, Oprah.

soulmates:
"people think your soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. but a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that's holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. A true soul mate is probably the most important person you will ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. but to live with a soul mate forever? nah. too painful. soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then they leave. "

contentment--one of my 2008 new years resolution--easier said than done:
"i have searched frantically for contentment for so many years in so many different ways and all these acquisitions and accomplishments--they run you down in the end. life, if you keep chasing it so hard, will drive you to death. time--when pursued like a bandit--will behave like one: always remaining one country or one room ahead of you, changing its name and hair color to elude you, slipping out the back door of the motel just as you're banging through the lobby with your newset search warrant, leaving only a burning cigarette in the ashtray to taunt you. at some point you have to stop because it won't. you have to admit that you can't catch it. that you're not supposed to catch it. at some point you gotta let go and sit still and allow contentment to come to you."
[...amen and amen!]

life's greater purpose:
"...but then i wonder, with all this restless yearning, with all my hyped-up fervor and with this stupidly hungry nature of mine--what should i do with my energy instead?
that answer arrives, too:
look for God. look for God like a man with his head on fire looks for water. "

Hailey Harris is now Hailey Bello!

Hailey, I was honored to be your bridesmaid. I will never forget all of the wonderful times we shared together—Hawaii, Thailand, scuba diving in Honduras, living in Kenwood together, our Montana road trip, and the years of growing and learning we shared with each other. I am so happy you found Chandler!

I couldn’t believe 2008 had finally arrived. What 17-year-old actually looks 10 years ahead and thinks of the large responsibility that will await them if they make one simple choice—innocently running for student government? Not me. 17-year-olds are considered minors. If it’s against the law for them to make certain choices shouldn’t subjecting oneself to forever planning your high school reunions be one of them? Unfortunately the system failed me and at 17 when planning my campaign with the clever slogan “We’d have a ball!” I also sold my soul to my high school class forever. And now, here I am 10 years later and no ones forgotten. Anxiety hit me full force by February. I think I was thinking at 17-years-old that I’d be dead by 2008 or that no one would really care or I’d be wealthy with a personal assistant who would plan the whole thing or that no one would remember who was supposedly in charge of these once-a-decade events. Alas, I was way off.

By the end of the process I was 600 dollars in the hole, but had one amazing reunion planned. Many friends came to the rescue producing a video for our classmates to purchase to help cover costs, and many classmates came out of the woodwork sponsoring numerous items of the reunion. I couldn’t believe the hands that went into this.

When the day of the reunion arrived someone was hosting the family picnic in the park, someone else was picking up and purchasing desserts, someone else was decorating the venue complete with vintage leopard fabric while others were preparing their skit and emcee routine and setting up the slide show. Those who created the web page and blog were updating the latest and managing the paypal accounts, and I was setting up the memoir table while taking time to try on my pep club skirt to see if it still fit (it definitely did not) and searching out someone who might have an extra xanax on hand. (I found one--it was awesome).

And in the end, I am so grateful to have seen this process being done. It was amazing what our class accomplished together. I can look back and laugh at the anxiety I felt, the humorous hate mail and complaints I received expressing how my reunion efforts have somehow ruined their lives. (My favorite one: “Are you numb to life? Are you dumb?” my response: “No I’m not numb to life, I spend all my free time searching out lost classmates, and selling my belongings on ebay to get by. So glad I found you yesterday.”… I never knew how many classmates were out there that didn’t see a therapist after high school, and should have). I can laugh at the phone calls I would have with the class presidents from neighboring schools all trying to figure this “reunion thing” out and the little support group we formed for each other: “Hi, my name’s Lauren, and I in 1998 I ran for senior class president. I thought it was cool to run for office. I didn’t know the effects it would have on me 10 years later, and the stress and anxiety it would cause me and my loved ones. I wish I could take that first smell of victory back…”

I then look at the finished product realizing this all came together with the overwhelming generosity and talents from our class 10 years after we parted ways and headed out on our own. We all have a piece of ourselves left in the four years of adolescence we experienced in East High and in the memories we shared together that it was enough for our class to come together, to make it happen, and to see the reunion succeed. I thought, as much as we can look back at high school and laugh and roll our eyes and say it doesn’t matter, it’s all a deep piece of us. We each went through it. Whether we had to have therapy to get over the four years of hell we experienced there, whether we were the homecoming queen, whether we just did our own thing with the drama crowd and never looked back once we got our diploma, it’s still a part of who we are, and it resonates deeply enough for many of us to care and to return, at least for an evening once every decade.

...until 2018.

east high class of '98

I can’t believe the summer has come to an end. I’m loving the crisp air and the feeling of being chilled in the evening when I step outside needing a jacket. But I’m still unsure where the summer went. No road trips this year. No pool time. Not even a summer tan, (oh wait, I’ve never had a summer tan. That would be a pigmentation problem, not a time issue.)

This season was a busy one for me. Perhaps my most busy summer to date. Whew! I worked full time, planned my high school 10 year reunion (something I could write a memoir about. It has all the needed factors--suspense, romance, revenge, grudges, long-lost friends, tears, horror, love... It at least could have been an MTV reality show) I dated a darling boy, went on an incredible vacation to Alaska, and ended the summer in one giant swoop by becoming single again, quitting my full-time job, moving downtown, and reanalyzing and readjusting my life. I guess I am still in that last phase--the reanalyzing and readjusting part. I am applying for jobs, but taking my time, hand picking the right ones and pursuing what I think my dream still is and always has been—reporting…or maybe event planning…or living in NYC and designing…or acting…or moving somewhere...as long as it isn’t here and as long as it is a big city, chaotic, preferably dirty, full of people, crazy minds, and out-there ideas. (A city that could increase my anxiety and give me a taste of neuroticism).

Who knows what the next month or two hold for me. Big decisions await.

.

Alaska with my Aunt Ruthanne was incredible! We spent our days dining on seafood, getting needed massages, whale watching (we saw three!) and taking a glacier helicopter tour. Yes, I can now say I’ve walked on a glacier. (take that!) In each town we visited I pictured the summer home I would have there...or found it, tucked away in the most perfect crevice on the mountain side, old and run down and waiting for me to move in. It definitely won’t be my last time in Alaska.
As my sweet father said as I was taking off to the airport, "your finally seeing your 49th state." It's true. And it's been my favorite one thus far.

My little brother is married! And what a marriage! His wife, Maryam, was born in Iran and moved with her parents to the U.S. when she was five-years-old. She comes from a Muslim background, but last year converted to the LDS religion. They were married in the LDS temple, by President Dieter Uchtdorf (my apostle crush…I know, it’s seems so wrong). After the wedding, a traditional Persian ring ceremony was held. Two Persian professors from the University of Utah recited the script, first in Farsi, and then translated into English. When Pace and Maryam walked down the Aisle, rather than Pachelbel's Canon playing, there was cheering, clapping, and chanting. Pace and Maryam then sat up on a platform as symbolic sugar was sprinkled on them, and pastries passed out to the guests to symbolize a sweet life for the bride and groom. My favorite moment was when they each were asked to dip their fingers in honey, and let one another lick it off the other ones fingers. That was also to symbolize sweetness. But if you ask me, there’s a whole lotta symbolism in that one, and it’s not just sweet. Hot, more like it. Just plain hot.

After the ring ceremony, hors d’oeuvres, and wine, dinner began at 8. During dinner, my brothers played two songs on the guitar, (I’m sure it was the first time bluegrass music was played in the Grand America Hotel, we opted to leave the banjo home, seriously, my family has such class), and then Pace and Maryam performed their “First Dance.” Mr. Persian DJ (complete with a silk over-sized collar, and velvet sports jacket) dimmed the lights, turned up the colored spotlights, and cranked up some fine Celine Dion. Bryn, who was sitting at our table, (the cool table), cynically mentioned, all they need now is a fog machine. Magically, right after she said those very words, the fog machine started up full blast. You could hear the fog machine more that you could see it. Nevertheless, it was a beautiful dance, and touching, as Maryam’s father walked forward, tapped Pace on the shoulder, and finished the dance with his daughter.

Then desert—the cake cutting! Persians have it figured out. Rather than have the single girls attempt to catch a bouquet, they instead have them each dance with a knife before the cutting of the cake. So, to clarify, they gather the most bitter wedding guests together, and give them weapons. How appropriate. Maryam did still throw her bouquet as well, (I think she did that only so I wouldn’t feel bad I didn’t get a a knife, she knew better) and, of course, I caught it…(would anyone have doubted!?) Okay, okay, so I didn’t exactly catch it mid-air, but I did super-block it mid-air, and then made a quick grab for it off the dance floor…Ah, and speaking of the dance floor, I’ve learned there is nothing quite as fun, sensual, and fabulous as Persian dancing. We danced the night away! Well, until midnight, that is. Even my 89-year-old grandma Melba was out there, in the middle of the dance circle, doing the Charleston, with Mr. Persian DJ, large silk collar and all, cheering her on. It was the party of the century...to say the least.

My Uncle Bill Pitts, aka “Step-Daddy”, in town for the event (and pictured below), told me we need to stick to the ethnic wedding theme when I get hitched. He is now busily planning the Alabama Hog Slaughter. It should be a fun time. And this time we won’t have to leave the banjo at home. Now, I jus’ need ta git ma-self a man in time fer da weddin’. Any ideas, send them to stepdaddy@gmail.com ;)

Just as I seemed to finally catch onto blogging, life slowly became too overwhelming to continue this new hobby. To sum up the past two months, I want to share what I have learned, what I have discovered, and what I desire for myself.

While in line to fill a prescription, I stood behind a woman who was rather unkempt. Her clothes were dirty, old, and mismatched. Her hair--messy, and she had no make-up on. In front of her, she had her grocery cart, and inside sat her two beautiful children. Ironically, these children (a boy and a girl) were dressed immaculately from head to toe. The little girl had the most perfectly parted pigtails, complete with matching ribbons, and the little boy had his blond hair spiked with mousse. When another person in line, in front of her, commented on the woman’s adorable daughter, the woman beamed as if she had just received the greatest compliment anyone could give her. I realized that this woman’s happiness was completely contingent upon her children's happiness and success. She seemed to have sacrificed everything of herself to give her children the greatest life possible. I hoped, at that moment, that her children would indeed grow up to be successful, well-rounded, and happy. I wanted that for the mother, more than anything, so her sacrifices would be well worth the effort.

As I stood in that pharmacy line for way too long, and continued to observe this little family, I related it to how God must feel about each of us--his children. He really does want us to have all that we desire. He wants us to succeed, and to be happy. He wants us to understand the power within us to follow our individual paths. Just like these children’s mother, His happiness is also contingent upon our happiness and success, and He has sacrificed so much for us. He's done this so we can have, and be, everything we desire. That is His greatest desire.

One of my favorite quotes by Marianne Williamson states: "...We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same..."

Of course God wants his children to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous! Not only are we finding our own happiness by succeeding in life, and following our own intuitive path, but we are showing our love for God in doing so. He gave us life, freedom, talents, choices, and abilities. I consider Gods sacrifice for us the most incredible gift anyone could give. It is the gift of endless potential. All we have to do is accept this gift. Unwrap it. We need to carefully take off the ribbon, and open it. And inside, the possibilities are endless!

This moment was my most meaningful moment since I last wrote. I had been sick, at that point, for over a month. My MS had flared up, and I had been to numerous doctor appointments, and had recently had I.V.’s to help with the symptoms. I had been down on myself, and on life. But in this pharmacy line, I realized freedom, and an abundance of opportunity.

I want to live my life continually realizing, and reaching for, my potential. I want nothing less. I want this for myself, for God, and for those I love.

It has been stated, “A great potential is life’s heaviest burden”. Although there may be truth to that statement, I would still rather know the burden, than to feel I am limited in what I can personally do. Anne Frank referred to our potential as good news. She wrote, “Everyone has inside of him a piece of good news. The good news is that you don't know how great you can be. How much you can love. What you can accomplish. And what your potential is.” I think Anne said it perfectly! Our potential is great news! We were created in the image of God—our father. And just as Marianne Williamson said, “We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.”

I'm in Vegas. For work--a United Way conference. Tonight, my last night, I stayed inside my hotel room, laid in my crazy-soft, king-sized bed, wrote an essay, caught up with some emails, and relaxed. Tomorrow--back to the real world of SLC, and my overly-hard bed. 
I love my co-workers. Aren't we a great looking bunch of philanthropists? ;)

Quite the weekend...

I thought the fourth of July was a good time, but have concluded Saturday that the U.S. could definitely up our excitement as far as holidays go, and that we should take a few tips from India. At the Hare Krishna temple in Spanish Fork, Utah, at 5:30 pm, after chanting and drum roll, the paints flew in celebration of Holi, or “The Festival of Colors.” After the clouds of chalks and paints settled, and I could slowly breath again, the thousands of people, now in full color, began to dance as we continued the Hare Krishna chanting, and bonfire was lit. It was a tremendously fun night, to say the least. Below, thanks to Preston, there are some videos from the festival. I’m already planning on next year.

…On Friday, yet another reunion with old friends took place. This time it was spent over sushi, and a sleepover at the Grand America hotel. It was a touching night to be reunited with 7 close girlfriends. Needless to say, we stayed up till 3 am in our executive suite, attempting to summarize the past 10-years of our lives. I was struck by what my best friends had dealt with. All of them, incredible women—smart, beautiful, compassionate, each had a story…one of a loss of faith, another--infidelity, one who wrote a suicide note—pills in hand, another had years dealing with postpartum depression, and one, a recently broken marriage. It might be rather candid what I am writing, yet, I feel, this is the human condition. What they have felt is what it means to really partake of being alive.

As I listened this night, admiring the strength that was in that room, I questioned what my own happiness is contingent upon. I hope that I can be led to find happiness and value in what I can always hold onto, no matter what is taken from me. Where that happiness lies for me, I am constantly deciding, and adding upon. But in those unsparing times, I hope I can have the solidity and consciousness of self that these women in our elegant hotel room have. I hope to add a bit of them to me. I am indebted to them for sharing.

Whoa March. Life continues to be so busy.

-I love throwing parties, but am taking a break for a while. I’ve helped plan five this month, three of them being in one weekend. We planned everything from a “Dater-Haters Party” (obviously, an idea stemming from my mind), to a “Black and White party” at the Governors mansion, [photos below], to a “Persian night” where my soon-to-be sister-in-law (that was a lot of hyphens) Maryam and her father spoke about Iran, and I filled myself up with baklava that was so good I'm pretty sure it's what inspired Jamiroquai to write the lyrics to his song Feel So Good. At least the part where he sings, " I've journeyed to the other atmospheres, and every breath I take just makes it clear, I'm holding heaven in my hands." They told me the secret ingredient was rose water. I beg to differ. I think it was sugar that made the baklava exceptional.

-Dana Hale and Ben Curtis were married in Hawaii. As one friend of mine mentioned, it’s seems to be quite a trend for my friends to be getting married these days. I agreed, and said that as long as they keep getting hitched in Hawaii, I’m definitely down with the trend. I spent time mediating on the beach, snorkeling, and pretending to sun bathe while wearing SPF 50 and reapplying every 15 minutes. Oh, but lesson learned, do not EVER forget to apply sun screen on your feet. I’m still having a hard time walking.

-Burke Rich and Liz Robinson were also married. An awesome couple. Yes, awesome is the perfect adjective to use. "Radical" would also work. I’ve known Burke since I was 5-years-old. My dad and brothers played bluegrass at the reception. I was able to hold my new nephew and see him smile, (I'm definitely his favorite aunt already), spend the evening with the dear Rich family and friends [photo below], and eat the famous Rich family parfait cookies brought in from Jacob Lake, Arizona. They’re pretty much my favorite desert. And I will admit, I actually put about 10 cookies in a baggie, and took them home with me. Not the most classy thing to do at a wedding, but hey, they were parfait cookies--I do what I have to do.

I think the most meaningful moments this month have been reuniting with old friends. My mission companions and I went up to Kristy’s cabin and spent the night. My oldest friends—the two girls I had my first sleepover with when I was 3-years-old—Eliza Lorimer Richards and Leslie Brimhall King—met for dinner. It had been 6 years since I had seen them. I love these women so much. I think of my childhood, age 3 to age 18, and they were always there. Life has taken us different places now. Or perhaps it has just taken me a different place. They got married. I went on a church mission. They each have two adorable children. I don’t even have a dog. They’re mothers. I work full-time. To catch up with these friends made my month. It made me contemplate and reevaluate my life. My final evaluation is: I am happy where I am. One of my New Year resolutions is to work on being more content. I am content. And I like the direction I am heading. It feels good, and it feels right.

I have a few lifetime goals I take very seriously. Some think they are silly, and that I should focus my efforts elsewhere, but hearing that only makes me more determined. (gotta love reverse psychology:) . One of these goals is hitting all 50 states before the age of 30.

Whoever said there isn't anything to do in North and South Dakota was totally wrong. (well, North Dakota was fairly accurate). And whoever said Em and I were crazy for going there in January was also fairly accurate. With temperatures hitting -20 F (we have photos to prove it), we hit 5 National parks and 3 states in three days. Not to mention we met some adorable Italian men. :) It was a great Bday trip!

I only have Maine and Alaska to go. If anyone knows of any maine/alaska tour, for under 50 dollars, let me know.

Thanks and sponsorship for this trip going to Bryn Arnell and Delta Airlines. Lauren's 50 states are almost complete!

With encouragement from my co-workers at United Way, specifically Kelsey-dear, I will attempt to continue my blog, and maybe, just maybe, give my address to a few chosen people. I haven’t fully concluded that blogging is my thing. We shall see.

A quick update from the past few months:

It's already February. Whew. I love the beginning of every year--a fresh start, and new goals. And it has been a good year thus far...very good.


First and foremost, I became an Aunt! I savor every photograph Clark and Bethany send from New York. I cannot wait to meet Adrian Soren!









I also turned 28 in January. I enjoy getting older. With each year I gain more experience, memories, knowledge, and even opportunities seem to increase. It's exciting. This year I celebrated with many friends, throwing a birthday party along with Katherine Mackey.



Last week I was honored to be a bridesmaid for my dear friend Ally Whitby. I loved my bridesmaid dress (gasp), and Mary Anne and Whitney came over to help me with my hair. It was a long day, but a touching day, seeing Ally get married, and realizing I have known her since the 4th grade. Old friends have a special place.

Tonight I was asked by a friend over dinner, "What has been one of the best days of your life?" I didn't need to contemplate long before I answered, my day in Bethlehem. Wait, no, the night, traveling alone in Thailand, meditating, and watching the sunset on the beach...oh, but also the day in Guatemala, dancing with the tribesman, that's hard to beat.
...and then I continued...last night was a good night. I felt empowered to be single, to be strong, to have options, and to have the freedom to do and be whatever my short attention span desired, (which last night was to become rich, live simply, and give every bit of my wealth away to charities, while I live in a hut in India making and selling jewelry). I wanted to turn on some hip hop and start dancing (which I did, and am admitting since it is late). The feeling of freedom and opportunity was so overwhelmingly beautiful.

Those are my best days. Those full of freedom, contemplation, and empowerment. It's why I love traveling, why I need it, why I crave it, and why I savor it.

And tonight, I'm back to last weeks plan of moving to Tuscany, and writing my novel. But first I want to make some chocolate chip cookies--good ones. I'm holding off on India.

2007: It's coming to a close. It's been an unusual year...to say the least. I've concluded that if I were to ever blog, this would be the year to start. It seems as if I have had more "firsts" this year than I would have imagined, or perhaps even hoped. To have one more first in my life, one more addition to my already busy life, to keep it more busy, I shall delve into blogging. I've always been pro-blogging--sharing and donating in seeming support of the Socratic Method--the "marketplace of ideas." And so I begin, to blog, or to bloggeth. At the end of my most overwhelming, growth-provoking, wow, did that just happen, yes, yes it did-year, I begin my first blog.

-Lauren Ruth, blogger